Too Cool for School

In today's heavily social (media) world, sometimes a "Too Cool for School" craze catches on. What's "too cool for school?" You stop wanting to learn and experience life. Why? Because you're already being told what's "cool."

All of us are exposed to this phenomenon today over the internet, pads, phones, and myriad devices. It's worth challenging the net-like peer pressure to keep learning and discovering for yourself. Nothing against nets. After all, spiders use nets to catch food...just not other spiders. It's not easy to resist the pervasive culture. But your health and well-being benefits from wisely choosing how much you want to be involved.

Too cool for school tells you what's important to value. The more hits, the more news-worthy. The more likes, the more reliable. Is that how we really feel inside? That's a question for each individual to ask for his or herself. When it comes down to it, tweets, likes, hits, and thumbs up will never compare to solo and individual experience. Taste something and decide for yourself how you feel about it.

Even if a million people say it's worth following, it's okay to say you don't dig it. In fact, you'd probably rather go for a walk, write a story, or do nothing at all. The point is, you're not uncool just for having ignored it. Life is yours to live and learn through. Learning to filter all the stimulus available today to decide what's valuable to you makes a difference.

If you feel out of vogue, behind the times, not hip to it, or out of touch with the scene...maybe your mind and body are trying to tell you something? They're probably reminding you that you are cool for school. It's hip to be square.

If a Tree Falls and No One Hears It...?

The question goes, "If a tree falls and no one hears it, does it still make a sound?" I'll shake this question up a bit and ask, "If you experience or see something, and no one else responds to it---did it still happen?"

At one time or another, each of us faces a situation in which we strongly experience something that no one else responds to. Know the feeling? Without anyone else echoing what you saw or felt, you may wonder whether you imagined it all. Throughout life, it can be challenging to hold onto your true experience when you're getting the message from others that it's better or more convenient to dismiss it.

You're like the tree (without the falling part necessarily). The tree still falls even if no one is there to witness it happening. That's what's most important. In your own life when you go through something that's important to you, it bears the same significance regardless of whether other people acknowledge it or not.

It can feel frustrating to know your experience and then to doubt it because you feel alone there. The experiences you have that don't fit a formula or can't be categorized can feel like that the most. What's most important, however, is that it really did happen---for you. The tree doesn't care if anyone heard it fall or not. For humans, it's more complex than that. Still, we can learn from the tree in keeping the integrity of our experiences even when there isn't a witness to them.

This month, take in those moments that no one else but you responds to. If you make a joke and no one else laughs, you can still enjoy the joke for yourself. If you see or hear something crazy and there's zero reaction around you, remind yourself that the event still happened for you. If you see a hummingbird zip in front of your face, a lady bug appear on your clothing just when you need a little luck, or an unexplainable occurrence...it's okay if no one else is there to see it or react to it but you. Sometimes the coolest moments are like that.

The Turtle, the Rabbit, and You

The story goes that the turtle was slow and steady, but he won the race. The rabbit was faster from the start line, but he thought he had a big enough lead to be able to take a nap when tired. While he was napping, the turtle won.

The turtle was slow and steady and the rabbit was fast but lazy. This story brings up an interesting dilemma. How do you want to approach things?

The fear of being too slow and behind everyone else can rear its head in life. It tells you forcefully that you haven't reached where you need to be. You should be somewhere else. This somewhere else is in line with where everyone else is. The punch line is always that you're not good enough.

You might feel the opposite and more like the rabbit. You're so fast that you've reached the end, the destination---without actually crossing the finish line. You can just stop where you're at and nap without looking further. Do either of these feelings sound familiar?

The pace you're at in life is unique to you, but it can be easy to judge where you're at. Very often the judgement is unfair and not helpful toward where you want to go next.

How fast or slow can you go and still reach your goal? Does it matter what other people think about your decisions?

Life isn't a race. Ultimately, you are on your own path. Ideally, you don't want to be so slow so that you can't imagine the possibility of reaching your goal. In that case, fears and anxieties are most likely blocking your path. However, the steadiness of the turtle is helpful to emulate so that you don't give up.

You also don't want to be so fast and hurried that you prematurely run out of energy and feel tired before you near the finish line. In that case, you're probably running toward goals forcefully and somewhat blindly without a realistic pace. The strong potential of the rabbit, however, is helpful to see in your own life.

Most likely, you're somewhere in between the turtle and the rabbit and going at your own speed. Don't worry what others say, but look honestly at whether you feel too slow or too hurried in your efforts. It's not all about the finish line, it's about how you want to run your journey.

This week, take realistic steps to get where you want to go, and focus on running at a steady and confident pace.

Only You Can Do It

There are certain things in life that only you can do. Want to turn your health around? Only you can do it. Have a desire to reduce stress? It's up to you. Have you been thinking about improving your sleep, losing weight, clearing up your skin, or eating healthier? Again, all signs point to you. While you may find resources out there to help you along the way, the first step to getting what you want in health or any other area is the realization:

Only I can do this for myself. No one else can do it for me.

Life can offer openings for you to get what you want, but until you take ownership of what you want, these openings may be hard to find. The temptation is often to seek answers outside of you. What book will help, which video has useful information, what did your friend say the other day that her doctor told her to do? Education is important when it comes to health, but the first steps toward getting healthy are often simple and within your control. These simplest measures can be the most difficult to start even though they are completely within your hands.

We're taught to seek solutions elsewhere and doubt our own instincts when it comes to self care and healthy living. Your body, however, offers the most powerful clues on what to do to take care of yourself. When you ask yourself what you're uniquely aiming for, even when no one around you is on the same boat, you're taking care of your health. When you turn to yourself during stressful times and support yourself through it, you're clearer on how to get healthy.

Only you can do it. No one else can. Taking accountability for what you want helps you to own it and to take real steps to get there---no matter what. When you frame your goals outside of yourself and look outward for the answers, the challenging times can feel stuck rather than opportunities to learn and grow. This mindset can lead to a cycle of disappointment and discouragement.

Look at your health goals square on, and ask yourself what you can do. Don't turn to him, her, them, or it. Just you. Are you doing what is in your power to perform, or are you relying on flimsy suggestions from the outside? When you build your own foundation for your goals, then you can use others' advice with more discretion and make it work for you. This approach can apply to any goal in your life.

This week, remember that only you can do it. And then ask yourself what real steps you're prepared to take to make it happen.